Saying goodbye to 2017

So 2017 was a busy year for me. I moved from our home town to the countryside. There are some lovely views. You really do realise your missing out living in a town. All the lovely scenery and adventures you can go on are right on your doorstep. Not that I have the time to enjoy it. Knowing it’s there is good enough ha!

Changing GP surgeries was a big step for me. I get very anxious meeting new medical staff because of what happened with my birth experience and the treatment I received after. I have lost faith in large parts of the medical profession which is really sad considering I spent seven years working in it.

I was so anxious about attending my first appointment. They seemed nice enough though, so that was helpful.

I have found this whole move so stressful. I felt at times I took two steps back with my mental health. I have a great support network, well my husband has helped.

I told myself that everything will come together and I have to take everyday as it comes. It’s been hard as my anxiety has been through the roof. My mood swings have been bad and I’m happy one minute, low and nearly in tears the next and right through to feeling like I want to swing for someone the next.

We are a month in and I am little more settled. Still struggling with finding things to do and keeping little lady occupied.

I miss my family I think that’s the hardest part. Also not being able to visit my paps grave when I want to. It’s quite lonely as an adult moving somewhere new.

There’s been so much going on in the world and so many disasters it’s a scary time to bring a child up. Wondering what kind of future are they going to have. This is where I struggle with my PTSD. I sometimes lay awake at night and go over every worse possible case scenerio and think what would I do in that situation?

I have lost so much trust and confidence in people since suffering a traumatic birth. I think if it wasn’t their fault, it may be different. But because they were fully to blame I find it hard to trust.

On a brighter note we had our seaside trip to Haven, it was great, she loved it, So much to do. Couldn’t get her off the carosoul though. We got a rescue kitten, he is gorgeous and so tiny.

I started blogging this year too and I love it. Fingers crossed you haven’t got to bored of me yet.

Biggest pet hate this year is people continuously saying you will be pregnant before Christmas, I bet you! Hmm after what happened I don’t think so. (never again)

I was discharged from my counsellor. Mainly because I moved. I think I’m in a place now though that if I really need to talk to someone I will ask for help.

I am looking forward to spend Christmas in our new home though and looking forward to hubby cooking Christmas dinner. I can have a few cheeky glasses of baileys yum!

We had snow to which little lady loved. Checking outside her bedroom every morning to see if it’s still there.


  1. It looks like you have moved to such a beautiful place Kerry 💕. That countryside looks so peaceful. You are so lucky to get snow, what a perfect Christmas! ⛄️ Congratulations on the blogging award, fingers crossed for you! You are such an inspirational blogger, it’s well deserved! 😘 Have a fantastic festive Christmas in your new home! ❤️ xx

    Bexa |

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much Bexa, for your kind words. That’s lovely. yes it’s so different from living in the town. Taking some getting use to. But I love it. Xx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. The views surrounding you look incredible! It sounds as though you have come so far this year and I’m so glad to have met you through blogging. Congratulations as well on the blogging award, I have voted for you and you truly deserve it! The snow looks beautiful and I hope you have a wonderful Christmas! Sending Christmas wishes!xx

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much chloe. That means alot. It’s such a beautiful place. So different from living in a town. Taking some getting use to. have a great Christmas and new year. Thank you so much for voting xx fx

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m happy to hear you’re a bit more settled now. And I know to much about how it feels to move to a new place as an adult. You start to miss what you had and don’t know how to start over;) looks really beautiful with the snow and the landscape ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  4. The Views look incredible! Well done for coming through all the challenges you have this year. I hope you are able to gain the trust back with medical staff next year. I hope you and your family have a lovely start to 2018 xx

    Liked by 1 person

  5. This new place looks lovely. I’m sure you will settle in and have a beautiful life there. I have recently moved to a new place and had to get a new GP and therapist etc. Its not easy so give yourself credit for doing this. Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. First of all this is such a powerful post! Truly inspiring, I’m glad you came out on top and are pushing full steam ahead for your 2018! Second congrats on your award 🎉 I think you’re fantastic and I’m so pleased I got the pleasure of connecting with you over these past months! 💕

    xx Lena |

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Incredible post and so honest. We’re thinking of moving but only to the next town which isn’t even a 20 minute drive away but I feel so anxious even though I want too, the whole process is mind boggling with having to switch GPs sort out all the little things that actually matter the most so I think it was very brave of you to make such a big change and hopefully it will be for the better x

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, it certainly has been stressful and it has tested my patience. It was the best decision to move. Just hope I realise that soon. Ha xx


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