I want to start off by saying I love my daughter very much but there are times where I could pack a bag and leave. My gosh it is hard work. I loved it when she use to have naps. I could have a cup of tea or catch up on the washing. The little things that get put aside. I could clean the house as my husband has pointed out that since we have put our house on the market, in his words “it’s never been so tidy!”
My face said it all.
We have decided to move to the countryside, a fresh start away from town life. My daughter will love it, she is very much an outdoor baby and my husband also. He loves camping and hiking. Me not so much, I am terrified of spiders and bugs. If there is one in the house I grab the cat and set the cat on it. Cruel I know but I am terrified.
The realities of being a mum
Clothes and your body
The days of fitting into my size 8 skinny jeans have gone. I am lucky if I could get them past my thighs now. I am trying to rock the curvy figure. I think I’m finally happy with my body as I have come to realise I won’t get my pre baby body back so sod it!
Finding a new style that suits you after having a baby is hard work. Your body completely changes. You end up with wobbly bits everywhere. Stretch marks are annoying. I used bio oil and coco butter for stretch marks, it’s great. I’ve now started using Nivea forming moisturiser as I’m two years on.
I ended up two sizes bigger in my bust so trying to find a suitable top to wear is an effort. I use to spend ages looking through my wardrobe deciding on an outfit to wear. The reality now is whatever is comfy.
Elasticated leggings are great!
Every bit of money we have goes on nappies, milk, bills and baby clothes because they cost a fortune and they go through them so quickly.
I use to have lovely fresh flawless skin with blemishes throughout the month. Through my pregnancy the blemishes cleared and I had that glow every woman has throughout their pregnancy, after the morning sickness had past. After having my daughter that changed I now rock the black circles under my eyes, the early wrinkles that are creeping in and even more blemishes than I had when I was a teenager.
Instead of buying a moisturiser that could be used as a primer I now by anti-ageing cream and under eye cream because I look like a panda or I’ve gone a round with Floyd Mayweather. (Sad Face)
Hormones are rubbish!
My hair use to be long, thick and wavy. Now it’s short because it started falling out and it is going grey. My hairdressers said go for the mum look, short and sweet. I hated it.
What is the mum look anyway! I men when you have a baby is there a way you are supposed to look now! Accept like a panda/zombie.
The days of having a bath with a bath bomb and painting my nails or shaving my legs are but a dream now. I have a quick bath, quick scrub and sit on the edge of the bath whilst leaning out the door shaving one leg and keeping an eye on my daughter playing in her room. I don’t wear many summer dresses anymore as I either have hairy legs due to having no time or cuts everywhere due to having no time, but I did it anyway. I do use the anti-ageing dove body wash. It smells gorgeous and makes your skin as soft as a babies bum.
I can’t remember the last time I got into bed and had a full night’s sleep, without being woken up by my daughter or my husband’s snoring, because he’s exhausted. A jab to the side does the trick normally!
I go to toilet and my daughter just sits there, sat on her step stool just watching me. “Good girl Mummy” she says. I use to cringe having these beady little eyes staring at me but now it’s just part of my toilet routine and it’s nice to get some praise every now and then in life. I guess even if it is on your toilet routine.
Making lunch is a pain. I make my daughter’s lunch and no matter what I make she wants to eat mine first. So I deliberately make something for me that she won’t eat just so I get to eat in the day. No is not an option as the toddler meltdown comes. You know; it’s the end of the world, I’m going to throw myself and my fork on the floor and scream until I get the crisps off mummy’s plate!
Cuddles with Dad
Cuddles with my husband on the sofa whilst she is awake are a no go. We have to wait until she’s in bed or she comes running over “my daddy.” He loves it and I smile, secretly I’m jealous.
Other people’s children
I had an experience recently of what it would be like having another baby. I missed out in the early years with my daughter. I had my nephew over. He’s 11 months old. I now had two sets of beady eyes staring at me while in the bathroom as heaven forbid I could leave them together for a minute in a different room, that’s a no go! My daughter looks at him as her dolly. I had to have one eye on my daughter, she’s two and very mischievous, and one on my nephew who has just started walking.
As if that wasn’t stressful enough I had my 8 year old nephew to, I thought I would be fine. He would play on his Wii, my little nephew would most likely sleep and my daughter whatever she wants to do. She is two going on twelve. Although I remember the days of playing outside (nowadays it’s all technology) my daughter gets up in the morning and instead of asking if Daddy is at work now she says. “Mummy where Daddy’s hipad” (she calls it). I reply “at work with daddy.” She was not happy!
Back to my day, I ended up playing referee between them. Of course they all wanted the same toy. Even with the age difference between them. Dinnertime was about who could scream the loudest and get the most attention or arguing over who was allowed the sauce first.
It was like having to tame three monkeys although even they would have been better behaved I think. All I could do was make sure they survived the next couple of hours and remained in one piece. I had to repeatedly grab my daughter from trying to climb up the stairs as we were at my Mum’s. An exciting environment as there was no baby safety hurdles to overcome. My nephew cried every time I put him down and my oldest nephew was shouting at the TV as his game wasn’t working properly. At this point I had both my daughter and nephew under my arm. My Mum’s neighbour waved to me from outside the window I felt like writing an SOS on it, if I had any hands free that is.
The time came round for my sister to pick them up. She asked if everything went ok. Of course I replied yes. Why do we do that? I wanted to say no it was awful, never again!
How do you do it having more than one?
Pushchairs and car seats
Something I have learnt is no matter how hard you try to fit two pushchairs and two car seats, which by the way are like space shuttles nowadays. Trying to fit them all into a Nissan Micra is a no go. I spent half an hour trying to fit everything in. In the end I gave up. And what is it with only having two or three Baby parking spaces at shopping centres? My biggest pet hate is when you see people park there with no kids the same people that will beep you for crossing the car park because you are taking your time crossing with the kids. I feel like I’m the Incredible Hulk!
I just want to jump up and down on their car or launch it across the car park. I’ve learnt a smile and wave also works just as well as it winds them up even more. I love being a mum but sometimes I sit and look around at women walk past not a care in the world looking gorgeous and I think if only I could do that body swap like on the film Freaky Friday with Lindsay Lohan.
I wonder ……
But I really would miss my daughter too much for amount of sleepless nights and tantrums I go through with her I wouldn’t change it for the world x
Twitter handle -@KTmummy